I wonder why.

Posted: October 16, 2012 in Faith
Tags: , , ,

Years ago when I was in a bad place in my personal life, I wrote this poem to try to express the pain I was feeling:


I wonder why life’s twists and turns

Never gives you what you really yearn

Someone to love you, to make you complete

To help you over life’s many hard feats.


I wonder why people often misunderstand

What you really want out of life’s grand plan

Someone to hold you, to tell you they care

To look in your eyes and really be there.


I wonder why things never seem to change

Heartache and pain always part of the game

You do your best always hanging tough

But in the end it’s still not enough.


I wonder why these things happen to me

When all I want is to love and be free

Be free to give and receive just the same

But it never seems to be part of the aim.


I wonder why I just sit here and stare

With teardrops falling wondering who cares

Hoping that one day all this hurt will end

And maybe my life will begin once again.


After having gone through two divorces (yes, two) and another failed relationship, I was at a loss as to why those relationships kept failing.  Knowing what I know now, I realize that the love I was looking for was not the love of a man, but the love of Jesus.  Unfailing love. Perfect love.  No one will love me more than Him.  When I think on that, I am overwhelmed with emotion. I don’t have to wonder about anything.  I know I am loved.

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